. besides that.”“Nice to know you still have a sense of humor.”“Yes, sir. It was Kelly.”“Sir, you’re out of time. We can’t do anything about how you died but we can give you a second chance.”“Yes, sir, it’s what we do.”“Sir, when I say ‘out of time’ I mean ‘out of sequence.’”“Yeah, Kelly robbed you of thirty/ forty years.”“Sir, I just looked at your file.”“This one is it ... number nine. Last chance.”“Yes, sir ... I had no idea you were our first last chance.”“I’m proud to meet you, Colonel Jacobin. Your file makes for exciting reading.”“I’ll have to check, sir. In any case, you’ll have to finish out this one before you can read it.”“The reason I called?”“Oh ... there’s been an accident.”“Yes ... I already said that.”“It’s a pretty big one.”“You were redirected incorrectly.”“1959 ... a day after your father’s death.”“You were supposed to go to 1955 ... thirteen years old.”“Yes, Yes ... I know ... the angst of puberty and adolescence.”“But, sir ... think of the plus side. ‘55 Chevy and. To be honest, it's actually the shit.HERMIONE. What? No! NO! I WON'T EAT YOUR SHIT, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?RITA. Oh, believe me, you will.HERMIONE. [Cry]. NO! Didn't I eat your cunt good enough? You said I had really pleased you! YOU PROMISED TO HAVE MERCY ON ME! RITA. I didn't promise anything like that. And if you really want to please me, show me your shit-eating skills, dear!HERMIONE. HAVE A MERCY! Please... [Sob].RITA. Enough! Stop that nonsense. Remember your duties. We shouldn't keep listeners waiting. You better shove your cute little nose between my buttocks... yes, this way, right into my asshole. Sniff it, take a deep breath! HERMIONE. [Sob]. Please...RITA. [Fart! FART! Looong farts]. Yes, sniff my farting hole. How do you like it?HERMIONE. Oh my... [Cough]. Rita, did you use the Dragondung Potion?RITA. Yes, I did. That potion really works! What a terrible odor... Dear listeners, it's hard for me to breath. I can't imagine how Hermione endures it. I better cast Bubblehead charm.
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